So I was thinking today...

So I was thinking about my ex today. He just popped into my head for some reason. And I was thinking about if we had stayed together and had children. Now, bear in mind that he has two beautiful children who I love dearly, but he has red hair. And is pale as snow. His son, got blonde hair, his daughter got his strawberry blonde hair. And on girls it is too cute, but it would have been my luck that we would have had sons and *shudder* I was horrified at the thought of the little male ginger babies we would have had! lol, that's terrible, but it's soooo true!!

So is it wrong of me to always think of whether or not the potential children I could have with a mate will be attractive or not? I mean, I know I have good genes, but (and especially if they haven't procreated previously) what about them? I mean, how am I to know which genes will show up dominantly in their children? Whew! It makes me really nervous!! I mean, I REALLY lucked out with Ryland looking like me because, quite frankly, his dad has started to look like a cabbage patch doll, and on a 34 year old man that is NOT attractive. He didn't look like that when we hooked up, and Dawn agrees that he's looking weird now too. Anywho, that may make me sound like a heinous bitch, but it's the God's honest truth.

Moving on, yesterday as I was walking in my house (after having to ask my neighbor to have all of the birthday party guests that parked in front of MY house move) I was walking inside and heard a male voice from behind me say"hey", so I turned around and it was this guy in a car. I'm too far away to see who it is. So this guy goes, "hey, what're you doing?" I was like, "I'm gonna go make dinner" rolled my eyes, and started to walk away. And he was like, "what you don't remember your buddy Will?" So I screamed and ran over to him and gave him a hug. So this guy is a very attractive black man who I used to work with at a factory. He wrote me poetry when we worked together and has always wanted me bad. But I've never looked at him like that. I've always thought he was hilarious and smart, but I wasn't attracted to him in a sexual way. So when he called me today, instead of leading him on I laid it out for him. I said look Will you're an amazing person, you're attractive, smart, funny and just an all around great and fun person, but I'm not attracted to you like that. He says he understood, but I know he was hurt. I was really happy to see him though! Sigh...he wrote me another poem last night. It's cute, really it is. The first poem he wrote me was based on my name. Like each letter starting the line was a letter in my name. I feel bad, but he and I are a lot alike and I really value his friendship. I've known him for 2 years now and know that if I haven't developed those feelings for him yet after all the time we spent together, they're just not there for me. Unfortunately they are there BIG TIME for him. He told me "I just don't get it. Every other woman I want, I get. Except for you. You just broke my heart again. I'm over you now. But we're cool, we can still be friends." Which I'm really glad for!

Why? Why me?! Ugh!

My fwb (friend with benefits) stood me up last week. Yeah. Stood up by my fuck buddy. Nice. He even called me 3.5 hours before-hand to confirm plans, and then never showed up. To top it off, he didn't respond to any of my phone calls. I called twice that night and twice the next day and left him one voicemail. Nothing. What's really disappointing was that that was honestly, THE BEST SEX of my life. So I'm really pissed off. I mean, fuck, at least call me and let me know that you're not coming over. Be courteous. Be a courteous jackass. Boo to him.

Boo.

Proactiv

Started proactiv today...we'll see how it works. My forehead and my mouth/chin area have started breaking out REALLY bad lately. It's driving me crazy!!

So, before picture:

Yes, I know it's sideways, tilt your head...

NeoPlanet 2

Help us please!

I found out today that my grandpa has lung cancer. It is at least Stage 3. He's going in on Thursday for surgery. They are going to take part of his lung, possibly the whole thing. My grandparents can't get the money to pay for the surgery without paying large penalties so my family is going to try to raise the money to pay for it ourselves. We are going to be making and selling diaper cakes, homemade soaps and candles and all proceeds will be going to pay for the surgery costs. If anyone is interested in purchasing some of these please let me know! We can ship them to you too! The soaps come in really fun shapes too! Some of these would be great for kids who want some kind of reward for taking a bath. Scrub up enough and there are toys in your soap!

Loch Ness Monsters

Easter Eggs

Crayons

Snake

Also we have organic soaps that come in Apple Cinnamon and Strawberry Fields. They smell really yummy and have natural exfoliants in them to make your skin silky smooth!

And there are also homemade candles.

And diaper cakes! This is a small one, we can make them as big and ornate as you want!

Front view

Top view, the thing in packaging is washcloths made to look like a lollipop!

Anybody who is interested in ordering ANYTHING, please let me know!!

Really now....

So, some interesting things have happened lately....

First, there was this tenant who I always had a thing for, but him being a tenant, I never made my move lol, well last week he moved out...after he walked out I thought to myself, I should look him up on myspace...I didn't want to seem like a stalker, so I didn't. Then that night after I put the boys to bed I got online and lo and behold...he had looked me up! Score! I thought that was rather ironic. So clearly there's something there.

So, fast forward a few days and 3 days after he gets my number and says he'll get ahold of me...nothing still...so I shoot him a little note on myspace saying that I was disappointed that he no longer wanted to do naughty things with me...he of course responded saying that he didn't do naughty things, he was a well behaved young man...but that he seriously had been thinking about doing naughty things with me for awhile. So I told him to get on the ball because I never stay single for long! He responds with this...

Sounds like we are pretty much both on the same page. My only question is what do you want from this?? Is this just 2 adults enjoying each others company, or are you after something serious?

So I tell him the truth. That if he wants something serious, I can try, but can't promise that I'll be able to dedicate the time to a full blown relationship at this time. And that if we're just gonna hang out and it turns serious, great, if not, that's fine, but that either way it'll be fun because damnit I'm fun! But really, I'd quite like to rape the hell out of him! :)

He read it...and didn't respond...grrr...I hate that!

So then, I'm doing a lease at work today and one of my tenants (an older black man, about 60 or so) walks in with a bag and sits it down on my desk. I look and there are flowers in said bag. I'm like, "oh are those for me? Thanks!" He tells me yeah, it's for st. patricks day. Weird, but ok. So he leaves, and like an hour later I remember so I look in the bag. Flowers, Juice, Raisins, and a card. Yeah, you can't make this shit up. Apparantly I need some more fiber in my life...so I read the card. It says, and I quote, typos and all (with a few interjections from me):

Hello! Beautiful, I know we talk a little at your office about a lot of things, I was just curious if you could use a special friend in your life at this time. (special friend, like a doll? not quite.) You've been saying your a single parent and I am single, maybe you would like to have someone around who would say and do nice things for and to you. (Did you catch that last part? The "to you". Can I just say that gave me the huhhhs.) Some things about me, I am an Industrial engineer out of work, drawing benefit checks until the economy picks up. I have 5 degrees in business and technolgies. From Chicago and living here in Elkhart for 4 years. My last girlfriend is in jail for none payment of child support, she's white with 4 kids and I don't know when she gets out.

He signed it and included his cell phone number.

You don't believe me? Here's a picture of me with my juice and raisins! Gotta love that fiber!!!

In other news, the bear got his first tooth yesterday! Oh, and Kaiden destroyed his tv, it won't even turn on. How he did it, I have no idea, but he did! So now, he goes to sleep with no movies. That first night was rough, but after I told him he didn't get to cry about something that HE did, it's been ok. I told him that even thought mommy COULD get him a new TV, she won't. He went to bed with absolutely no problems last night. This could be the night time salvation I've been looking for all along!

Pictures of the bear:

Bananas are my favorite!!!

I'm trying to crawl mom!!

And I've started on Ultra 90...I'll keep you all abreast of how that goes...so far so good! Oh, and I'm also starting the curly girl hair method, also known as no-poo! (no shampoo ya sickos!)

Til next time!

xoxo- Janice